Yes, I do. I am starving, gnawing at my own arm as I type. I knew going off medifast for the holidays was pure evil. I am back on, day two, and I want to eat everything in sight!!!!! I am not sure that broth will control the evil creeping into my soul. The desire for Papa Johns pizza or Dominos or onion rings is destroying my will to be thin. Whatever will I do? Why do I have to be fat? Why can't I eat like those thin girls??
I sent Paul to the grandparents, Eric is working, dear God it is just me and the baby. I hope I don't eat him too.........
I need help.
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Saturday, December 29, 2007
I'm Back!!!
So sorry it has been so long (as though anyone reads this). I actually forgot to post with everything going on. But, I am back now.
I turned 30 a few weeks ago!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yep, it has happened. My husband called me up on my birthday and said, "Happy Birthday, your fertility has now decreased by 50%". Yes, PCOS can kill your fertility at age 30. I think I took it all in stride, really not too much panic, and only a few Chik-Fil-A sandwiches...
But, I digress. Christmas was lovely, and we had Santa and the Tooth Fairy here in the same day. Paul was concerned about them meeting and stopping to talk, but I assured him they are great friends. In fact, in my bizarre mind, Mrs. Claus fixed the Fairy up with her husband, the Easter Bunny.
Also, a Christmas miracle occurred! Eric, my darling faith confused husband, has decided to be Catholic with us again. He went through a three year crisis of faith and decided Jesus was just a cool guy and no God. But, he is back.
I am looking forward to election season. I am unable to go and volunteer for Edwards this time, mainly because with work, school, the kids, Eric's erratic schedule, and my laziness, there is no time. That and Medifast leaves me with no energy. Yes, I have been cheating, and am now trying to get back on plan......I will get there. Anyway, I am hoping that Edwards gets the nomination, but will be happy if Obama does too. The only thing I could not handle is if Hillary does. I think I will move to Canada. I cannot respect someone who does nothing to publicly condemn a cheating husband. It is not okay in my book, and it gives women a bad name. I also think she is in bed with corporate America.
What are my issues? HEALTH CARE, Iraq, and Abortion rights. I really think we need to have a single payer government health care plan. Yes, I have done the research, I have MHA for goodness sakes!!!!! I will post more on this later. I will in fact post my comprehensive plan! As for Iraq, I want everyone out NOW!!! I also want us to focus more on Afghanistan. Remember when Bush said we wouldn't abandon them? Yeah, he lied then too! As for abortion rights, I will not ever have an abortion. I do not condone abortion, nor do I think it is ever a good option. However, after two children, I know how much a pregnancy and a child changes your life. As a health care worker, I firmly believe decisions should be between a person and their doctor. No one has the right to tell a woman what to do with their body! Never! I am 100% pro-choice. I always will be!
But, I am not without flaws, I shop at Wal-Mart.
I turned 30 a few weeks ago!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yep, it has happened. My husband called me up on my birthday and said, "Happy Birthday, your fertility has now decreased by 50%". Yes, PCOS can kill your fertility at age 30. I think I took it all in stride, really not too much panic, and only a few Chik-Fil-A sandwiches...
But, I digress. Christmas was lovely, and we had Santa and the Tooth Fairy here in the same day. Paul was concerned about them meeting and stopping to talk, but I assured him they are great friends. In fact, in my bizarre mind, Mrs. Claus fixed the Fairy up with her husband, the Easter Bunny.
Also, a Christmas miracle occurred! Eric, my darling faith confused husband, has decided to be Catholic with us again. He went through a three year crisis of faith and decided Jesus was just a cool guy and no God. But, he is back.
I am looking forward to election season. I am unable to go and volunteer for Edwards this time, mainly because with work, school, the kids, Eric's erratic schedule, and my laziness, there is no time. That and Medifast leaves me with no energy. Yes, I have been cheating, and am now trying to get back on plan......I will get there. Anyway, I am hoping that Edwards gets the nomination, but will be happy if Obama does too. The only thing I could not handle is if Hillary does. I think I will move to Canada. I cannot respect someone who does nothing to publicly condemn a cheating husband. It is not okay in my book, and it gives women a bad name. I also think she is in bed with corporate America.
What are my issues? HEALTH CARE, Iraq, and Abortion rights. I really think we need to have a single payer government health care plan. Yes, I have done the research, I have MHA for goodness sakes!!!!! I will post more on this later. I will in fact post my comprehensive plan! As for Iraq, I want everyone out NOW!!! I also want us to focus more on Afghanistan. Remember when Bush said we wouldn't abandon them? Yeah, he lied then too! As for abortion rights, I will not ever have an abortion. I do not condone abortion, nor do I think it is ever a good option. However, after two children, I know how much a pregnancy and a child changes your life. As a health care worker, I firmly believe decisions should be between a person and their doctor. No one has the right to tell a woman what to do with their body! Never! I am 100% pro-choice. I always will be!
But, I am not without flaws, I shop at Wal-Mart.
Monday, October 22, 2007
The scary realization
Okay,
So I went a few weeks to see if anyone was actually reading this, which they aren't. So, I guess I can say anything I want. Yeah, like I would really hold back! So I have lost 22 pounds on Medifast so far in 4 weeks. I am feeling pretty good about that.
School is going well, I am getting A's, life is good. Eric's job still sucks, and we are totally broke! Oh well...
I am angry at Family Care Connection. They are this back-up daycare we contract with through work. So, I called them Sept 30 to tell them I needed back up care for today, Oct. 22. I gave them all of my information, address, etc. My daycare lady had jury duty. So, yesterday I had not heard a peep about who was coming so I called. Hmm, suddenly they have no one that wants to drive to Greeley! What, after almost a month's notice?????? Can you use a phone???
So, long story short I complained to HR today. I had to have my mother-in-law watch the kids. She has Parkinson's Disease. This is not a good combo with a 19 month old. Paul goes there once a week for an overnight and stays the next day, but she does not see the baby often unless we are there or her husband is. I love my mother-in-law. Borderline adoration!!!! I have known her since I was 15, and she is my partner in crime. I hated calling her last minute to do this. I am not sure if she felt obligated to do it or not, but she did it and I totally appreciate it. I left work really early and got the kiddos before they totally wore her out!
I am tired, Peter is feeling crazy (think he might be getting sick), and it is bedtime. 'Till next time, if anyone is reading this......
So I went a few weeks to see if anyone was actually reading this, which they aren't. So, I guess I can say anything I want. Yeah, like I would really hold back! So I have lost 22 pounds on Medifast so far in 4 weeks. I am feeling pretty good about that.
School is going well, I am getting A's, life is good. Eric's job still sucks, and we are totally broke! Oh well...
I am angry at Family Care Connection. They are this back-up daycare we contract with through work. So, I called them Sept 30 to tell them I needed back up care for today, Oct. 22. I gave them all of my information, address, etc. My daycare lady had jury duty. So, yesterday I had not heard a peep about who was coming so I called. Hmm, suddenly they have no one that wants to drive to Greeley! What, after almost a month's notice?????? Can you use a phone???
So, long story short I complained to HR today. I had to have my mother-in-law watch the kids. She has Parkinson's Disease. This is not a good combo with a 19 month old. Paul goes there once a week for an overnight and stays the next day, but she does not see the baby often unless we are there or her husband is. I love my mother-in-law. Borderline adoration!!!! I have known her since I was 15, and she is my partner in crime. I hated calling her last minute to do this. I am not sure if she felt obligated to do it or not, but she did it and I totally appreciate it. I left work really early and got the kiddos before they totally wore her out!
I am tired, Peter is feeling crazy (think he might be getting sick), and it is bedtime. 'Till next time, if anyone is reading this......
Sunday, October 7, 2007
What a weekend!
So, Eric's check finally came in and the bills are paid. Well, at least the one's we could pay :)
We had an awesome weekend. We moved Peter into his own room and he is doing a great job of adjusting. Paul's room and the front room are still a mess, but oh well, shit happens. I guess we will just have to clean it up slowly. But, he is at Grandma's tonight so who cares. I just bathed Peter and put him to bed and Eric and I are settling in to watch our DVR of this weeks SVU.
Friday night we just hung out and read after the kids went to bed. Eric got home pretty late, so we had not much to do. Saturday we moved the rooms and ran a bunch of errands. Paul had his skating lesson, and he has decided he wants to play hockey! I am very excited about his. Of course if he stayed with figure skating I would be happy too, but I am into the hockey idea for the game, ya know? I am very excited!
After we got home we went ahead and watched the Sandlot together. Wow, Luke Perry is not Dylan anymore, huh? But, it was a cute movie. We liked it a lot. Then, after the kiddos went to be we watched Knocked Up. OMG it was so funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But, I got a little emotional. Eric and I talked about the begining of our relationship because we laughed so much at the movie. We were total opposites, and total opposites of the movie, ya know got married and then got pregnant, but it was really quick. It was great and we had a good talk as a result.
So movies and fun this weekend! I am pretty happy, and feeling much better since Friday.
We had an awesome weekend. We moved Peter into his own room and he is doing a great job of adjusting. Paul's room and the front room are still a mess, but oh well, shit happens. I guess we will just have to clean it up slowly. But, he is at Grandma's tonight so who cares. I just bathed Peter and put him to bed and Eric and I are settling in to watch our DVR of this weeks SVU.
Friday night we just hung out and read after the kids went to bed. Eric got home pretty late, so we had not much to do. Saturday we moved the rooms and ran a bunch of errands. Paul had his skating lesson, and he has decided he wants to play hockey! I am very excited about his. Of course if he stayed with figure skating I would be happy too, but I am into the hockey idea for the game, ya know? I am very excited!
After we got home we went ahead and watched the Sandlot together. Wow, Luke Perry is not Dylan anymore, huh? But, it was a cute movie. We liked it a lot. Then, after the kiddos went to be we watched Knocked Up. OMG it was so funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But, I got a little emotional. Eric and I talked about the begining of our relationship because we laughed so much at the movie. We were total opposites, and total opposites of the movie, ya know got married and then got pregnant, but it was really quick. It was great and we had a good talk as a result.
So movies and fun this weekend! I am pretty happy, and feeling much better since Friday.
Friday, October 5, 2007
Ah, another day in paradise
I am so glad it is Friday! Don't get me wrong, I love my job, but I am ready to have a weekend. We are moving Peter out of Paul's room this weekend, and I am looking forward to it.
Except, Eric just called and informed me that his paycheck was going to be delayed and that it was not direct deposited on time. Okay, how am I supposed to pay the bills? They say it will be in tonight, but I am not holding my breath as Eric also said his boss was complaining about money to him. EXCUSE ME??????
Not to go on a total ballistic rant or anything, but this is a small company having growing pains. It is a family business, and the owner should retire. Her son is a pain in the butt whiner, but it is how we pay the bills so I try to not complain. He also is slightly more intelligent than his mom.
Background: his boss lives in this over a million dollar house and literally pisses money away. Her son lives in Highlands Ranch, which is like major bucks! My husband was recently passed over for a promotion because of his family. Yes, I know this is illegal, and I really want to do something about it. But, it is his choice, ya know, and the economy is not so good so we deal with it. He has been averaging 20 hours of overtime a week for the last few weeks. SO to say I am bitter is a little of an understatement. The fact that they are instrusive and irritating makes it rough. Eric leaves for work at anywhere from 3am on and can come home as late as 4am. The phone rings off the hook from them or employees and I am getting sick of it.
He gets very little vacation time, and they recently (without telling staff) started counting sick time against vacation. They never did this before. So, if he takes a day off for a sick kid or himself it is gone. Did I mention he has to be gone overnights a lot too?
Okay, enough of the evil job talk. Calming thoughts, happy place.
I weighed myself today and I lost a little bit more, but not enough. I am a bit hungry now and can't wait for that Medifast shake......yeah ;(
I just got a call from the sitter and Peter's diaper rash is not getting better, poor kid. He had seven teeth come in over the last few days and it has messed him up. Sounds like it is yeast from what she says, so Nystatin time!
Oh, Eric just called again from Nebraska. Seems the boss decided to add on two stores to give him even more overtime! Guess she is really worried about that money. UGH, he is not sure when he will be home. Guess there goes the family movie I had planned. Another night of me and the kids! Thank God for them!!!!!!
So, I am going to promise to post again when I am in a better mood. I also promise to put some pictures out there and decorate things.
Except, Eric just called and informed me that his paycheck was going to be delayed and that it was not direct deposited on time. Okay, how am I supposed to pay the bills? They say it will be in tonight, but I am not holding my breath as Eric also said his boss was complaining about money to him. EXCUSE ME??????
Not to go on a total ballistic rant or anything, but this is a small company having growing pains. It is a family business, and the owner should retire. Her son is a pain in the butt whiner, but it is how we pay the bills so I try to not complain. He also is slightly more intelligent than his mom.
Background: his boss lives in this over a million dollar house and literally pisses money away. Her son lives in Highlands Ranch, which is like major bucks! My husband was recently passed over for a promotion because of his family. Yes, I know this is illegal, and I really want to do something about it. But, it is his choice, ya know, and the economy is not so good so we deal with it. He has been averaging 20 hours of overtime a week for the last few weeks. SO to say I am bitter is a little of an understatement. The fact that they are instrusive and irritating makes it rough. Eric leaves for work at anywhere from 3am on and can come home as late as 4am. The phone rings off the hook from them or employees and I am getting sick of it.
He gets very little vacation time, and they recently (without telling staff) started counting sick time against vacation. They never did this before. So, if he takes a day off for a sick kid or himself it is gone. Did I mention he has to be gone overnights a lot too?
Okay, enough of the evil job talk. Calming thoughts, happy place.
I weighed myself today and I lost a little bit more, but not enough. I am a bit hungry now and can't wait for that Medifast shake......yeah ;(
I just got a call from the sitter and Peter's diaper rash is not getting better, poor kid. He had seven teeth come in over the last few days and it has messed him up. Sounds like it is yeast from what she says, so Nystatin time!
Oh, Eric just called again from Nebraska. Seems the boss decided to add on two stores to give him even more overtime! Guess she is really worried about that money. UGH, he is not sure when he will be home. Guess there goes the family movie I had planned. Another night of me and the kids! Thank God for them!!!!!!
So, I am going to promise to post again when I am in a better mood. I also promise to put some pictures out there and decorate things.
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Hello and welcome
Hi all,
I like to tell stories, I like to sit on the internet, and I know a lot of usless facts, so here I am!
I am sitting in my living room, typing and watching my youngest kid Peter (18 months) throw up on my urban rebounder. Is he trying to tell me something? He seems to want to spit on it everyday, and I have only had it for a week. I am a bit confused. But, as we are trying really hard to wean, anything that keeps him from my breasts is good for me. I have loved nursing my little boy, but now that he is able to practically ask for it, rip my shirt off and nurse with both feet on the floor as I sit on the couch, I think it is time. I am hoping it works by the time he is two. I am also trying really hard to loose weight, as I am VERY large, but I am one of the unfortunate souls who gain or don't loose while breastfeeding.
My DH is cooking dinner and I am salivating because I am on medifast and already ate my lean and green for the day. But, I am down 10 pounds in a week, so I am not complaining.
I work in a hospital lab, and have for several years. I just finished my Master's degree, but am back in school to be a medical laboratory technician, another associate's degree. I am a little backward......
Thanks for visiting, I have never blogged before so hopefully I will get the hang of it before other people get bored!
I like to tell stories, I like to sit on the internet, and I know a lot of usless facts, so here I am!
I am sitting in my living room, typing and watching my youngest kid Peter (18 months) throw up on my urban rebounder. Is he trying to tell me something? He seems to want to spit on it everyday, and I have only had it for a week. I am a bit confused. But, as we are trying really hard to wean, anything that keeps him from my breasts is good for me. I have loved nursing my little boy, but now that he is able to practically ask for it, rip my shirt off and nurse with both feet on the floor as I sit on the couch, I think it is time. I am hoping it works by the time he is two. I am also trying really hard to loose weight, as I am VERY large, but I am one of the unfortunate souls who gain or don't loose while breastfeeding.
My DH is cooking dinner and I am salivating because I am on medifast and already ate my lean and green for the day. But, I am down 10 pounds in a week, so I am not complaining.
I work in a hospital lab, and have for several years. I just finished my Master's degree, but am back in school to be a medical laboratory technician, another associate's degree. I am a little backward......
Thanks for visiting, I have never blogged before so hopefully I will get the hang of it before other people get bored!
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